Anger is a normal human emotional reaction that involves psychological and physical health changes (Pashupati & Dev, 2012). Research has shown that anger might vary in intensity from mild irritation to intense rage and fury (Pashupati & Dev, 2012). Sometimes it may not be possible to express anger out loud. Maybe you don’t have the words to express your anger, or maybe you’re afraid that it might make things worse. When you cannot talk about your anger or express it freely, it is crucial to find a healthy way to process anger to avoid it building up or turning inward. Here are some healthy and effective anger management strategies to help redirect or release constructively and safely.
Relaxation Techniques: Calm Your Mind and Body
Simple relaxation strategies like relaxing imagery and deep breathing can actually help reduce feelings of anger. Other relaxation strategies that can help reduce feelings of anger include taking time out and the 90-second rule.
- Deep Breathing: Breathe deeply from your diaphragm, as breathing from the chest won’t relax you much. Slow, deep breaths while maintaining a count can help regulate your heart rate while also calming your nervous system (Pashupati & Dev, 2012).
- Relaxing Imagery: Using imagery, focus on visualizing a relaxing scenario from your imagination or your memory (Pashupati & Dev, 2012).
- Taking Time Out: When experiencing feelings of anger, it is better to step away from the situation that caused the anger. You’d be surprised at what a few minutes of stepping away from the situation can do.
- The 90-Second Rule: Anger, just like other emotions, can feel overwhelming and linger longer than expected. However, the initial anger reaction lasts for only 90 seconds. The 90-second rule was proposed by neuroscientist Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor. After the 90-second chemical reaction ends, any lingering anger is fueled by thoughts of the trigger event (Travers, 2025).
Engaging in Physical Activities
Anger is a negative feeling as well as a physical reaction that causes a person’s heart rate to increase, their muscles to tense, and floods the body with adrenaline. For this reason, doing some physical activities may help reduce anger faster.
- Engage in ball sports like volleyball and soccer to help reduce anger (Kjærvik & Bushman, 2024).
- Engage in physical education classes, including group games and sports.
- Aerobic exercises also help reduce anger by burning off the excess energy associated with anger.
- A change of scenery can also help reduce anger, as stepping away from the trigger is a good way to manage anger.
These activities help manage anger since they elicit positive emotions, and they include playing (Kjærvik & Bushman, 2024).
However, other physical activities like jogging may lead to an increase in feelings of anger as jogging is monotonous and may lead to frustration or boredom, which further aggravates feelings of anger (Kjærvik & Bushman, 2024).
Express your Feelings without Speaking
Just because you cannot talk about how you’re feeling doesn’t mean you cannot express your feelings.
- Journaling: Maintaining a thought diary or an anger journal is a way of expressing your feelings of anger without necessarily talking about it (Anjanappa et al., 2023). Journaling helps introspect about feelings of anger and the thought process related to anger (Anjanappa et al., 2023). Additionally, it also helps a person to write exactly how they are feeling without censoring anything.
- Create and innovate: This does not only apply to artists. You can’t draw? Not a problem. Just take a pen or pencil, scribble or paint anything. You can also play some music or write a poem. Channel your anger into something creative since creativity has a way of transforming anger into something meaningful.
Reflect and Plan After Calming Down
Once you’ve calmed down after the feelings of anger, you can reflect on the real issue and decide how to deal with it (Kraft, 2010).
Questions to ask yourself to understand the situation better include:
- What was it that really triggered me? Try to understand the specific issue that triggered your anger (Kraft, 2010).
- Why did it trigger me that much?
- Will the issue really matter after some time? Whether after an hour, a day, or even a month?
Once you’ve completed the introspection, you can decide what to do afterwards. Whether to address the situation with the involved party or decide that the direct confrontation is not necessary and avoid the whole situation.
When to Seek Help
Sometimes individuals can fail to control their anger, allowing the anger to control them. Some people often have a short temper, leading them to display anger in a primal state (Plumptre, 2021). When anger becomes overwhelming to an individual, it becomes difficult to manage, which can cause problems in life and spoil relationships (Plumptre, 2021). When anger gets to this point, it is crucial to seek professional assistance, treatment, and support.
If you feel that your anger is too strong or overwhelming and cannot be contained through self-help, you should seek professional guidance to help you get your anger under control.
A licensed mental health professional can help you understand and control your negative thoughts related to anger.
References
References
Anjanappa, S., Govindan, R., Munivenkatappa, M., & Bhaskarapillai, B. (2023). Effectiveness of anger management program on anger level, problem-solving skills, communication skills, and adjustment among school-going adolescents. Journal of Education and Health Promotion, 12(1), 1-9. https://doi.org/10.4103/jehp.jehp_1216_22
Kjærvik, S. L., & Bushman, B. J. (2024). A meta-analytic review of anger management activities that increase or decrease arousal: What fuels or douses rage? Clinical Psychology Review, 109, 1-14. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2024.102414
Kraft, S. (2010, August 18). Seven great ways to deal with anger. HealthyWomen. https://www.healthywomen.org/content/blog-entry/seven-great-ways-deal-anger
Pashupati, M., & Dev, S. V. (2012). Anger and its management. Journal of Nobel Medical College, 1(1), 9–14. https://doi.org/10.3126/jonmc.v1i1.7282
Plumptre, E. (2021, June 15). What to do if you have a short temper. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-manage-a-short-temper-5186900
Travers, M. (2025, March 10). A psychologist shares the ‘90-second rule’ to survive emotional waves. Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/traversmark/2025/03/10/a-psychologist-shares-the-90-second-rule-to-survive-emotional-waves/
